A new baby is big news for a small child. Toddlers can’t imagine what it will be like, and they often worry, without the words to say so, about where they fit in. A few simple habits, and the right story, can help.
Talk about it in their language
Keep it concrete and close to their world: where the baby will sleep, who will look after them while you’re at the hospital, what a newborn can and can’t do (sleep, cry, eat, not play yet). Short, repeated conversations work better than one big announcement.
Give them a role
Children cope better when they have a job. Let them help choose a toy for the baby, fetch a diaper, or sing a song. Praise the helping, not just the waiting.
- Show them their own baby photos and tell them stories about when they were born.
- Keep their routines the same as much as you can around the birth.
- Plan a little one-to-one time with each parent after the baby arrives.
Read a story where they are the big sibling
Picture books let toddlers rehearse something before it happens. When the big sibling in the story has their face and name, it’s easier for them to picture themselves there, and it says “you’re important in this” without a lecture.
Big Hearts for a Little One is written for this moment. You can add the new baby or a sibling as an extra character once you have a photo, at no extra cost. More ideas on our new baby books page.
After the baby arrives
Expect some regression: a toddler who was dry at night may have accidents, or ask for a bottle. It’s common and usually passes. Keep reading the story; it often becomes a favorite to come back to when things feel new.
If you’re worried about how your child is coping, your pediatrician is the right person to ask.
